22-05-2016 (Sun)

礼拜天  下午  晴天

前几天，再次的躲起来了。
这次，心还是沉重。对童年的时光，记忆不清楚。

其实，内心对父母，很需要。
想得到他们的认同，
想得到他们的爱 。

童年的时光，曾想要他的抱抱；
曾想要他陪着我，在游乐场玩；
曾想要他们让我尝试许多新鲜的事，例如玩沙、爬到高处、玩水、骑脚踏车、大手牵小手等。

好多时候，她会拒绝我玩得疯。
小时的我，文静不讲话，扮演大姐的身份。
长大了，内心有时会想疯一下。

耶稣，求你医治我、满足对父母的期望，阿门。

KNOW MYSELF (18/52, 19/52 and 20/52)

 18/52     How could this happen to me?

 19/52     Painful periods.

20/52     Sleeping hours.

KNOW MYSELF (16/52 and 17/52)

16/52     Sleepless night. Don't know why can't sleep well in three years.

God, please cure me.

17/52     For I am poor and needy, and my heart is stricken within me.

KNOW MYSELF (14/52 and 15/52)

14/52     Why can't I move on? Why am I so sad? Why?

15/52     My heart is sick and withered like the dried leaves.

 

KNOW MYSELF (11/52, 12/52 and 13/52)

11/52     After broke up with him, like to cry in the shower.

 12/52     Thanks God, I am returning to work after a long break of 10 months.

Feel excited and tired.

13/52     When I'm feeling down, want to go out but scared.

KNOW MYSELF (9/52 and 10/52)

9/52     When hand or body is getting dirty, just clean it.

But, how should I do when heart is getting dirty?

I feel myself is a hypocrite.

10/52     I often build an invisible wall around me.
It is because the feelings of distrust, insecurity and fear.

KNOW MYSELF (6/52, 7/52 and 8/52)

 6/52     Happy Chinese New Year.
In this cny, I was stayed at home the whole time and read novel.

 7/52     I'm a normal adult but feel like a handicapped child when communicate with others.

8/52     I feel helpless and don't know what to do.